Q: Some people say God is Love.
A: That is not a question. Please restate your query in the form of a
question. Abort, Retry, Fail?
Microsoft is trying to add some humor to its error messages in Windows 2000
and up. Here are a couple of examples:
* Printer not responding; Got a pen and paper handy?
* 3 things are certain in life: Taxes, death, and data loss.
Guess which has occurred?
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. “Do you need
some help?” I asked.
She replied, “I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door
unlocked. Now I can’t get into my car.
Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a
battery for this?”
“Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?” I asked. “No, just this remote
‘thingy,’” she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
I took the key and manually unlocked the door.
Eager to make full use of my new computer’s capabilities, I asked a
customer-service representative at my bank whether it offered on-line banking.
“Certainly,” she stated matter-of-factly, pointing to a crowd of people near
the tellers. “The line starts over there.”
My neighbour works in the operations department in the central office of a
large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their
computers. One night they got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who
had this question: ‘I’ve got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you
guys have a fire downtown?’
Three blondes are stuck on a desert island and one finds a magic lamp. They
rub it and a genie pops out and gives them each a wish. the first blonde says,
“I wish I was 10% smarter so I could get off of this island.”
Then she turns into a redhead and swims off the island. The second sees what
happens and says “I wish I was 25% smarter so that I can get off this island!”
She then turns into a brunette, makes a raft from trees and sails off. Finally,
the third blonde says “I wish I was 50% smarter so I can get off this island.”
She then suddenly turns into a man and walks across the bridge.